Friday, August 19, 2011

Drumroll, please

Today I am hosting one of my favorite authors.

She is the princess of pacing...

The master of motivating...

The queen of querying....

The dirt-biking diva...

And the critique partner of your dreams.

It's Bonnie Paulson!

Bonnie's awesome romance BREATHE AGAIN was just released by Carina Press (get it for your Kindle). Doesn't her cover make you swoon? And guess what? Her MC's name is Maggie! (don't worry, she picked this before she met me :)

Bonnie decided to do a guest post for us today about Forgiving Ourselves. Read her post and leave a comment and I will do a random selection so that one of our readers will get a digital copy of her new book.

Forgive thy neighbor. Forgive. Love. Turn the other cheek. Forgive them their trespasses.
Always, always Christians are admonished to forgive. Forgive. And always to forgive others.
Rarely do we hear about forgiving ourselves. Sure, we repent for Heavenly Father’s forgiveness. We atone for the wrongdoings we’ve committed. We accept apologies from others who have harmed or offended us, those who have hurt or ill-used us.
But what about our greatest transgressors? Our greatest saboteurs? Ourselves.
I remember things I’ve done in the past. Stupid, mean, spiteful things that I did but that I wouldn’t normally do and that I did my best to fix with apologies and repentance. But I remember the action or deed. It tears me apart still today. I go over and over in my mind what I did and how I could have changed it or done it differently. Sometimes, the guilt wakes me up at night and sometimes it just sneaks up on me when I’m doing the dishes or washing the kids.
I can forgive others, easily, but myself, it seems, I hold to a standard so high, that even though I know the Lord has forgiven me, I cannot find it in my own heart to forgive myself.
How do we forgive ourselves? For each person the answer is different. In Breathe Again, Maggie berates herself for the death of her husband. Without answers to key questions, she feels she is to blame and she can’t accept the possible chance at happiness sitting so assuredly before her.
Brodan, too, can’t forgive himself for the terminal sickness of his brother. He didn’t cause it, couldn’t have prevented it, but he still holds himself back from life and love because the guilt overrides his actions.
Writing Breathe Again awakened an awareness in me that everyone is on their own journey. If we can’t do what we’re supposed to and even forgive ourselves, how can we find what we’re really looking for?
I don’t know what I’m looking for, but I know if Maggie can do it, I can too.
What do you think you’re looking for and how hard is it to forgive yourself?

Thanks for having me, Maggie. I just adore you and everything you’re trying to achieve.

Don't forget to comment and Monday morning we'll select a winner!


Ruth Josse said...

I definitely think forgiving ourselves is way harder than forgiving others. We should give ourselves a break:) Thanks for the inspirational post!

Jessica R. Patch said...

I agree with Ruth. It's tougher forgiving myself than others. There's a sweet release when we do both.

Great post. Great cover. Yep, I swooned!

Deborah A. said...

Yay, Bonnie!! Congratulations! And yes. The cover does make me swoon. But only a little. (Insert blush here.)

I think the hardest part about forgiveness is dealing with the embarrassment of looking the offense straight in the eye. When the offender is ourselves, that makes it even harder.

Bonnie R. Paulson said...

Thanks for having me, Maggie. This was a great post.

@ Ruth, Jessica and Deborah, Thank you so much for stopping by. I agree (obviously)that when we have to look the offender in the eye it makes it hard to forgive - and looking ourselves in the eye in the mirror everytime we pass it makes it really hard. Your comments are inspiring. Thank so much for the validation!

Good luck with the drawing.


AND oh my word, this is hilarious! dirtbiking diva, hahahaha

Gayle said...

What a great message. It's true, I think, that it can be significantly harder to forgive ourselves than to forgive others. I find that I especially have a hard time forgiving myself for mistakes made as a mother -- sometimes the expectations I have for myself as a parent are very high and when I fail (which is often!) it is hard to let it go.

Bonnie R. Paulson said...

Gayle you took the words right outta my mouth! : )

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