Monday, February 28, 2011

Oh, she did not just do that!

There I was mid-stride. My heart pounded and I could feel the sweat coming on. I rounded the corner thinking my run was almost complete, but then realized I wasn't even close.

I wore tall black boots, a pretty black church dress, and had my hair done just so. A speaker at the oak pulpit spoke on the heavenly attribute of gratitude.

Now, this might not seem to be the perfect setting for running a race. But yesterday, that is exactly what my three year old forced me to do.

Hubby was out in the hall with Little Number 4, and all was well in the Fechner Family pew. But suddenly Little Number 3 glanced up at me with a look of pure mischief, and I knew trouble was brewing. In seconds she was out of the pew and had dashed down the aisle.

I walked calmly out of the chapel after her, but then my pace increased when I saw she had no intention of stopping. She darted back in through the gym and was in the chapel in no time. I had no choice but to begin a very unladylike chase.

After about three mortifying trips around the congregation, finally a kind lady reached out and stopped miss Little so I could catch up to her. We marched straight to a unused classroom, and had words. And after church Miss Little sat in a chair with her arms folded until I was confident she had demonstrated she knew how to be reverent in church. Believe me when I say I don't think this situation will be happening again.

But then, I never thought it would happen in the first place. I NEVER thought I would be that mother chasing her naughty kids around the chapel like a wild woman.

Have your children embarrassed you? Please, for my sanity, share a mortifying experience your children have graciously bestowed upon you.


Bonnie R. Paulson said...


Actually, when I was pregnant with #4, Bodey stood up in in his class and told the room of kindergartners that his mommy and daddy wrestled naked and now a baby was coming out of mommy's pp. (Yes, his words. I was MORTIFIED when the teacher pulled me aside and congratulated me on keeping it age appropriate, but that i should discuss where and when it's okay to share the information).

Yes, that was fun.

Maggie said...

Wow. That is too funny. Thanks for sharing Bonnie! And good luck on your WIP today. I see on your little ticker on your blog you are getting close!

April said...

Just for the record, I did not even see this on Sunday AT ALL and had no knowledge of it until you mentioned it RS. Must have been too busy freaking out about how irreverent my own kids were being! :)

Proctor Funk said...

Been there done that! At least your Little one was young enough you'd expect it....mine was 6....and screaming at the top of his lungs and screaming on the pew, then as he ran more screams.......I don't know if you were there that week, but I was TICKED!!!!!! Oh the joys! I hate Sundays...I'm trying to be more grateful for them, but I hate going to church SUCKS!

Maggie said...

I complete believe you, but this is hard to imagine, as all I remember from the Proctor kids are well-behaved children. In fact I was always telling my kids, "See how nice Sabrina sits?" I have only had to do church alone when I had two, so I can't imagine the stress. Hopefully Andrew's schedule will even out soon for you! We miss you guys.

I'm so glad you didn't notice! I'm pretty sure the bishopric got a nice show. :)

Deborah A. said...

I read this story this morning and thought it was perfect! I hope will never experience racing my child around the chapel, but if that day comes, I'll take comfort in knowing I'm not the only one. :)

Thanks for stopping by my blog. I found yours through I am a Reader, and I'm signed up to win a copy of Growing Up Gracie. I've got my fingers crossed! (Which makes typing challenging.)